The Mystery of Marriage

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OUR MATERIAL

FREE PRINTABLES

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TEACHING ABOUT HOLY MATRIMONY

Objectives

At the end of the lesson, the students should be able to:

Younger children

• State that marriage is the union of a man and a woman, blessed by the Holy Spirit.
• Explain that a married couple is the foundation upon which a Christian family is built.
• Mention at least one of the actions taking place in the Mystery of Marriage (exchange of rings, exchange of crowns, sharing the wine cup, holding white candles, walking around the table three times).
• On the icon of the Wedding in Cana, point to Jesus Christ, the Theotokos, the bride, the groom, the water turned into wine.
• Briefly retell the story of the miracle at the Wedding in Cana.

Older children

In addition to the above, the older children should also be able to:

• Briefly describe all the parts of the service of Marriage and their symbolisms.
• Recite or chant all or part of the troparion chanted at the “Dance of Isaiah”.

Vocabulary: MARRIAGE – MATRIMONY – CROWNS – RINGS – WINE – CANDLES

Planning the lesson

Using our material, a lesson on Marriage could go as follows:

First, introduce the Mystery. Acting out either with the children themselves and some simple props, or with dolls, can be helpful. We would only like to point out that such dramatizations should always be done carefully and with the appropriate reverence for the subject being taught.

After introducing the Mystery, the lesson could go as follows:

• Present the story of the Wedding in Cana (John 2:1-11).
• Explain how this miracle shows that our Lord has blessed the Mystery of Marriage.
• Discuss the relevant icon.
• Talk about the parts of the Marriage service, as they were previously acted out. Explain their symbolism.
• Work on reinforcement activities.

Reinforcement activities

In the printable packet, we are offering the following activities:

• Fact sheet and corresponding worksheet (for the older children)
• Icon worksheet (one for younger and one for older children)
• Match the images to the titles – an activity to learn about the rite and symbolisms of Marriage
• “Bomboniera” craft – A craft based on the Greek tradition of offering as wedding favors, while the guests are leaving the church, baggies made of tulle fabric and filled with white candied almonds (“koufeta”)
• Crossword puzzle
• Word puzzle (one for younger and one for older children)
• Board game

“BOMBONIERA” CRAFT INSTRUCTIONS

You will need:

• The templates found in our printable packet above.
• Scissors, glue stick, a piece of ribbon.

What to do:

• Fold the pouch as marked, and as shown in the photo above.
• Glue the almonds on one side of the pouch.
• Roll the top part into a cone and glue it together as marked. Flatten the bottom part of the cone with your fingers. This is the part that will be inserted into the pouch.
• Glue the two sides of the pouch together at the top, sandwiching the cone between them.
• Tie a bow where the cone meets the pouch.

READY!

BACKGROUND

The mystery of Marriage, or Holy Matrimony, signifies the mystical union of a man and a woman and the sanctification of their relationship by the Holy Spirit. In the early Church, the couple who wished to be recognized as married would participate in the Divine Liturgy and, after they both received Holy Communion, the Bishop would declare them husband and wife. Later, a special service was composed, with prayers, Epistle and Gospel readings, and blessings for a faithful life and the begetting of healthy children. 

The union of Christ and His Church is the ideal of the marriage of a man and woman. Just as Christ has a perfect love for His bride, the Church, so we pray for the couple to have perfect sacrificial love between them. In the Orthodox marriage, contrary to other Christian wedding ceremonies, the couple is not exchanging vows directly as one individual to another; instead, they are both offering themselves together to the Lord, so the Holy Spirit can unite and transform them.

The ceremony consists of:

• The Rite of Betrothal with the exchange of rings signifying mutual support and equality between the couple.

• The Rite of Marriage with lighted candles signifying purity, and then the crowning. The reading of the Epistle (Ephesians 5:20-33) and the Gospel (John 2:1-11) follow. Afterwards, the couple shares a common cup of wine to show equality of purpose and responsibility in their life together. Finally, the couple is led around the wedding table three times (the ‘dance of Isaiah’) to signify that they will preserve their marriage bond until death and that the Holy Trinity will bear witness to these oaths. 

The physical manifestation of the mystery of Marriage is in the rings and in the crowns. The crowns of the wedding are both royal crowns (the husband and wife being the king and queen of their future household) and crowns of martyrdom – because if a marriage is to be successful it has to be based on a relationship of mutual sacrifice. 

Scriptural references

Matthew 5:32, Matthew 19:4-6, John 2:1-12, Ephesians 5:22-23, 1 Corinthians 7:4

The service of Marriage

Iconography

An appropriate icon for discussing the mystery of marriage is the Wedding in Cana.

We see a festive table, at the top center of which there are the bride and groom, ornately dressed and crowned. At the bottom of the icon, our Lord is depicted at the left, blessing six jugs of water. The Theotokos is behind Christ, and He is turning backwards and talking to her. As in all Orthodox icons, the scene appears to be taking place outside. However, the buildings and red drapes in the background signify that it is actually taking place indoors.

EXPLORE FURTHER

• The Sacraments – Marriage – Orthodox Church in America
• Sexuality, Marriage, and Family – Marriage – Orthodox Church in America
• Holy Synod Encyclical on Marriage – Orthodox Church in America
• Sacred Image, Sacred Marriage – Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of America
• “Crown them with glory and honor.” Marriage in the Orthodox Church – Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of America